Monday, June 6, 2016

Transition

"During times of transition, when everything seems to be in flux, when your old patterns have collapsed, you may feel unsteady but are also most malleable to change. Now is the time to explore, brainstorm, consider the make-over before your life begins to naturally solidify into new patterns." - Robert Taibbi

I've been busy orchestrating a move from the city to the suburbs, learning how to be a good (hell, any type of) step-mom, and planning a wedding. Needless to say, life hasn't been about my normal W.I.L.D. adventures lately. My adventures are much more family focused and bigger and better than I could have imagined. I am working hard to appreciate the moments I'm provided, but admittedly have been filled with anxiety and even a bit of depression which has then lent itself to a stressed and crabby version of me that others get to deal with. I don't want to be that person. The thing is, I am not that person. While I am happily embracing my life changes, the fact is they are a huge change and transition for me, none of which comes with a "how to" manual (oh how I wish life did!) so I'm doing my best I can to learn on the fly, course-correct and apologize as needed along the way. 

Being in transition with a long list of "to-do's" that have varied deadlines, you tend to lose a bit of yourself. Or, at least I have. I haven't blogged, done a race event in months, nor have I had any Lynnsanity-specific adventures. Let me clarify the "Lynnsanity-specific" adventures for those of you that may be new to my blog(s). Lynnsanity and W.I.L.D. (What is Lynn Doing?) are silly things in life such as taking a new class, signing up for a "weird and random" trip, and taking on whatever adventures I dare. These types of experiences and outings are things that I identify with where subject matter is concerned, and they force me to challenge myself in some new ways (travel alone, exercise, socialize, relax, etc). They make me who I am and they keep me balanced. They are usually, but not always, done by myself.

This post is not to say I haven't had any fun or explored new, amazing things in the past months. I've had a lot of fun actually. I've been honored to be a part of a class field-trip (which may just be the best thing I've experienced this year to date!), attended the NFL Draft in Chicago, and recently learned a ton of new train details at a local museum stop. I am exploring awesome and amazing things as part of a new team, Team LynnEric-a and I am loving and enjoying every minute of it! This post isn't a bitch session about what I'm missing or giving up, because I'm gaining so many things. But rather, it's about how to maintain one's self to insure that not only am I happy with who I am, but also an effort to be a blessing to those around me.

So how do I blend Lynnsanity and Team LynnEric-a together? T
he great thing is, I have a built in, partner in crime who's usually up for anything, at any time! The Other Half has already planned our first wedded adventure of caving and hiking in Arizona next month! I can't wait to check out Tombstone and the Pima Airplane Boneyard. 

But the question still remains... What am I doing for myself? Being a part of a team is truly awesome but all things needed aren't always up to the team. Some things you just need to do for yourself. I want to take this time of transition and brain storm on what I can do to make me better and more balanced. I want to take advantage of this "malleable" stage of flux. Thankfully I've already been able to recapture some things like rubber stamping, card making and gardening which prove to be very therapeutic. These are things that I haven't done in over 8 years and am ecstatic to have gotten back into! But where do I go from here? I need some me time. Some down time. Only, I don't know what that looks like right now and since I'm still trying to figure out a new "routine", I don't know what I can realistically take on. A class of some type is probably too much of a commitment right now. But a massage? A walk? A movie for one? Yoga and meditation? Who knows, maybe. I'm not sure what my continued transition will hold, but I'm looking forward to finding it and beginning with this blog post is a good start.

Namaste.